Complementarianism. Evangelical churches embrace this term to define their position on women and church leadership. But we lack a shared vision of what this might look like in our churches.
The idea of complementarianism is rooted in the principle that men and women are better together, or in more Biblical language, “It is not good for man to be alone” (Gen 2:18). Complementarian churches are confronted with a troubling irony then, because when it comes to leadership, teaching, and setting the policies and vision for these churches, men are very much alone.
My aims here are not to solve any debates about what the Bible says about women and church leadership. I simply hope churches that claim to be complementarian will strive to explore ways to actually practice the principle of men and women serving together — in other words, that they actually be more complementarian in leadership and practice.
Here are two ways we can better practice complementarianism in our churches.
1. Learn to Let Others Lead Without The Office
Complementarian churches maintain a biblical line that women are not authorized to serve as pastors and elders. But we must remember that offices are positions of authority that encourage, shape, and equip the rest of the church to in turn teach and instruct one another in the church (Col 3:16). The New Testament repeatedly affirms a model of life together that depends on mutuality of teaching, imitation, and encouragement that does not demand that each member “teach” or “lead” from the imprimatur of an office. 1 Thessalonians 5:12 is one of the more instructive passages on church leadership. It describes the leaders as those who are over the church [προïσταμενους] and who “admonish” [νουθετέω] the church. Importantly, however, the very next verse (5:13) includes an exhortation to the whole church to “admonish the idle” [νουθετέω]. Leaders instruct and admonish the church so that the members of the church continue to instruct and admonish others.
If a church is blessed with women who demonstrate wisdom, maturity, and insight into Scripture, they should not need to hold an “office” before they are able to encourage their church with these gifts. Nor should we be resigned to simply let such women read Scripture on Sunday mornings. I grant that such mentoring, guidance, or even (gasp) teaching should be practiced under the authority and guidance of the church leaders — but such women ought to be encouraged to lead others in the ways of Christ rather than be relegated to less publicly invisible forms of ministry.
What this looks like will depend on each faithful church. I have been fortunate enough to be a part of churches that continue to be blessed with women bearing a wealth of experience, wisdom, and giftedness. Some are seminary-trained, others are now grandparents who have seen the whole spectrum of raising children, still others have had the experience of coming out the other side of grief or marital strife. I have learned and gladly continue to learn from many of them in ways that I could never learn from other men in my church. This learning has taken place not only in the contexts of informal moments of life together, but also and importantly when women were actively involved in leading organized church gatherings. In such spaces, these women have taught me about things like how to read the Psalms, how to better interpret John’s Gospel, about wealth inequality, about what the deal is with teenage girls, about raising the confidence of teenage sons, about which bands I should be listening to, about all manner of things that I need to learn in order to simply live better as a follower of Jesus. They have stories, voices, and demeanors that model Jesus for me and my children in ways that are completely non-substitutable by the men in the church.
2. Have Women in the Room
If women are not permitted to serve as elders, can they at least be in the room? Where is it in the Bible that elder sessions must be behind closed doors, shrouded in silence and secrecy? What is the wisdom of a male-only panel deciding church ministry and vision without the insight and wisdom of some of the most mature and wise members of the church these men participate in?
An elder meeting where the leaders are not actively listening to the counsel of wise and spirit-filled women are simply not complementarian (let alone biblical). Such leaders deprive themselves of one of the most important resources God has given them to lead faithfully and with wisdom. The reasons against doing this have more I fear to do with expediency and the maintenance of a familiar way of doing things than it might have to do with an earnest desire to listen to the needs and concerns of the church.
If your church meets in elder boards and sessions, I encourage you in the strongest way that I can: Please, invite women in your church who are filled with the Spirit and are respected for their wisdom to participate in these meetings. Give them a voice in your sessions. Let their concerns be raised. Let their perspectives complement the blind spots that often attend male leadership. Let their wisdom inform the decisions you make for the practice and vision of your churches. Let their prayers support everything that the church seeks to do for God’s glory.
Leave a Reply
Your email is safe with us.