Since publishing my article “I’m (Kinda Sorta Yeah Not Really) Gay” last month, I’ve received a lot of follow-up questions. Not so much about the article, but about the specifics of my struggle with same-sex attraction. Here are some of the most frequently asked questions. When did you realize you were, you know, gay? If you dig through my memory box, you’ll find a piece of paper decorated with hearts and a little stick figure....
Last week, Bryan wrote an article entitled, I’m (Kinda Sorta Yeah Not Really) Gay. As you might imagine, the post got a lot of attention: good, bad, and ugly. There were many who offered words of affirmation and encouragement, but along with these came comments with a totally different emphasis. The most common and fundamental objection that many readers had towards the post was that “being gay isn’t wrong.” In addition, the most emotional responses...
I admit it. I’ve tried to “pray the gay away.” I’ve spent nights on my knees, asking God to take away my homosexual desires. Any Christian who struggles with same-sex attraction has probably done the same, and rightly so. Casting our cares on God should be the first thing we do (1 Peter 5:7). So yes, I’ve prayed for change. And if you read last week’s post, you know that change hasn’t come. But what if...
People wonder if I’m gay. I know because kids in school used to ask me. When I replied with silence, they called me a fag and went on their way. If bullies wondered about my sexuality, then so did family, friends, people at church. They were probably just too afraid (or too nice) to ask. I’ve had years to think about it: if someone asked if I’m gay, how would I answer? Saying “no” risks...
You can’t love God and hate homosexuals. On the contrary, loving God means loving gays. Really, truly, honestly loving them. (Are you listening, Westboro Baptist cult?) That doesn’t mean voting “no” on Proposition 8 or waving rainbow flags in the nearest pride parade. No, biblical love for gays is far more extraordinary. It’s a Christ-centered love that meets them in their brokenness and offers the same grace that God extended to us, even when we...
Rapper KB dropped a killer debut last month with Weight & Glory, an album that puts to rest all debates on whether hip-hop is good or bad. If we’re judging by music, lyrics, theology and phat beats, the verdict is in: behold, it was very good. Weight & Glory is a musical sermon that urges listeners to recognize the weight of God’s glory, and to respond in worship. The 14-song set includes guest vocals from...
Homosexuality remains a hot topic both in and outside the church. But discussing it at length comes with two inherent dangers: either we see homosexuality as worse than all other sins, or we act as though it’s no sin at all. Last week, I responded to the first danger by reminding readers that Christians who struggle with homosexual desires are just ordinary sinners with the same extraordinary Savior. This week, I’m tackling danger number two....
Science says we can’t change our sexual orientation. Most people, from experience, would agree. Why then do we have Christians who call themselves ex-gay? Why do people who once considered themselves homosexual renounce their gay lifestyle, get married, have children, and go on worshiping God? Let’s look at two common answers: 1. Ex-gays are a myth, and those who identify as such are just “playing straight.” Religion guilts them into marrying someone they’re not attracted...
To the world, homosexuality is more than an orientation; it’s an identity. Being gay is like being black or vegan or republican. It’s part of your persona. Something to accept, embrace and celebrate. Coming out means becoming part of a community—complete with flags, parades and flashy bumper stickers. To the person who experiences same-sex attraction, the world says you’re gay. Now assume your identity. Be who you are. Jesus says there’s another way. See, Christianity...
If you haven’t heard it from Lady Gaga, you’ve heard it from those who struggle with (or embrace) homosexuality: “I was born this way.” Do you believe them? The catchphrase might match your theology more than you think. In a Christian worldview, the “born this way” theory fits squarely into the doctrine of original sin—the belief that we all inherited a sinful nature because of Adam’s sin. King David sings of being “brought forth in...
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